Project MotherHOOD with Michelle

I work full-time, I've always hated that term, as a teacher in Poughkeepsie, NY. Like many moms facing their children growing up, I am also figuring out that I have many interests and ideas that I would like to explore with limited hours in the day. I am a self- described herbal apothecary who loves helping others find natural, healthy ways to become their true selves.

1. What expectations about Motherhood did you have prior to becoming a mother?

It was a surprise entirely. I hadn't planned on it. I was in law school, I had a very idealistic version of everything being perfect and life falling into place. I thought I would discover a renewed relationship with my estranged mother and find and develop wonderful life long mom friends. My ideal plan centered around an established career and grounded roots.

2. How has Motherhood changed for you from being a new mom to now?

Motherhood, 3 kids in, was a metamorphosis. In the beginning, I was unsure and blamed myself for it. Why didn't I know stroking his forehead a certain way would soothe him, or that it made no difference to him if the wipes were warm, or that it's wasn't selfish to want time for myself. Now, I'm still unsure, but I see it as the best part of this journey. I can't make my kids anything other than the people they were divinely created to be. All I can do is set the table and prepare the path.

3. What current Moms goals do you have for yourself?

My current goals are to find the path of what/ who I was meant to be. For the past 14 years, my life has been dedicated to doctors appts, car pools, school appts, practices, games and family commitments, I squeezed in my career as an afterthought. I realize now that by not doing me, I am a hypocrite when I tell them to "Follow their dreams at all costs". Another goal of mine, has been working with younger moms to help them with the process of building a mom/ family lifestyle. Its easy to get sucked into the mundane, but by creating small family rituals, we can help each other learn to savor moments with our offspring.

4. Where are you most hardest on yourself as a Mother?

I am hardest on my time. 14 year in, I still struggle with saying no and being able to accept that I can't do everything, for every one at all times.

5. Where are you most nurturing toward yourself as a Mother?

My morning car-mediations. I use my commute as a time and space to think deeply about where I am, where I am going (literally and figuratively) and how to get there.

6. Note to your your younger self as a new mom from now.

Don't listen to everyone else's current advice too much, remember everything your grandmother and aunties used to tell you as a child. There is a reason the "old ways" stuck around so long. Second, remember that YOU have food you like, movies you love and hobbies that bring you joy- don’t give them up. Theses are the things that remind you how divinely unique you are. Lastly, you’re more beautiful and intelligent than you know. Each day will make you more so. Don’t ever doubt that...for any reason.

Thank you Michelle!

@MzHolmezspeaks